it is safe to drink lava also it is so so tasty
i am 6 years old and i see this. thank you internet stranger i am going to go do this
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Ok I love this???
"baptise me in hot dog water"
Hot dog water - there's a Tumblr post out there I've seen saying hot dog water is the opposite of holy water, due to the fact that a single drop of it will contaminate what it touches. I assume this was partly inspired by this allusion but who knows for sure.
Also the the idea of holy water as inhuman and cleaning vs hot dog water as the remains of feeding someone - often a child - and entirely human. It may be dirty and I do not want it on me but God hot dog water has some memories. You will not wash away my sins. They're mine. Also, anyone can make hot dog water but holy water is refined, restricted (yes anyone can make it in an emergency but lay people are restricted from it)
"you and I both know"
Unlike baptism for babies, this one is done between two people who are both aware of what is happening. The one receiving the baptism gives the orders about what they want to happen. The giver and receiver are portrayed as equals. They are equally aware of their humanity.
"the holy stuff won't take"
Ooof heartbreaking, amazing line. Raises so many questions. What does it mean when the water "takes"? What has the receiver done that makes them unfit for holy water? Or, what has the holy water done that makes it to weak to help, to be a part of your life?
The poem as a whole - I love the lack of capitalization. It adds a sort of intimacy to the poem, and the statement from the speaker. The high words "baptise" and "holy" being offset by "take" and "hot dog". Also "hot dog water" vs "holy stuff." The cadence! I would lick it.
I love the serious analysis, and I think I find it persuasive.
This also sheds a lot of light on some plot points in Scooby Doo! Mystery Incorporated.
Not to turn this into another house full of chintz, but I'mma fuck this poem on the floor.
Meter
There are two readings of the poem's meter that I immediately identify, the first is how I'd want to read it, and the second is how a normal person would probably read it, but both make the same point.
In my interpretation (left), the first line is four wholely irregular feet: an iamb into a dibrach into two trochees; The second line is two trouches into a hanging stressed syllable; And the third line is three iambs.
In the more normal interpretation(right), the first line and second line are six trochees all together plus that hanging syllable in 'knowing' which transitions the poem to iambic trimeter.
And look at the interesting result of that laid bare:
In English poetry there's a tradition, all other things being equal, that iambs are considered the sophisticated foot with trochees often being contrasted as the vulgar or common foot.
The vulgar in specificity "hot dog water" is put in trochee, while the respectably vague "the holy stuff" is afforded iambs. Without the poet having thought of the stress things the pattern actively, this incapulation of the English poetic tradition is astounding. Especially when you consider the
Chiasmus
Chiasmus is a figure of rhetorical construction, in which two pairs of ideas are laid across each other, A B B A. It's one of the more popular figures of rhetoric and if you're looking for it you'll see it everywhere.
In the most literal sense, it's about repetition; but, you can apply it more liberally to ideas, thoughts, or in this case, parts of speech:
The nouns and verb pairs in the first and third lines crossover each other. They are in chiasmus. Structurally, the inversion makes the poem feel more solid, while still furthering emphasizing the contrast between the idea of hot dog water and the holy stuff.
Opening with a command and closing with a result.
ALTthis was submitted as a one sentence horror story, but it feels like it could be an old jewish joke, like the one about the two rabbis proving g-d doesn't exist or the saying 'people plan, g-d laughs'
This is a thousand times better as a dry Jewish joke than it is as a fake-deep edgelord ‘horror’ story
Even more, it sounds like the beginning -- the set-up -- of the joke. Can’t you hear Carl Reiner opening a bit with this line, or Shalom Aleichem using it to kick off a story?
Well I'm not quite an old Jewish man just yet, but let me give it a shot...
Losing confidence in Himself, G-d became an atheist. He decided to go down to Earth, to walk among humans and see how they found meaning.
He wandered the world until he came to a town, where he happened upon a pastor. "Come to our church this Sunday!" said the pastor. But G-d shook his head. "I don't believe in G-d anymore," he told the pastor sullenly. "And besides, I really shouldn't be working weekends." . . .
βthe ending is always the sameβ
war of the foxes - richard silken / waterloo - ABBA / euripidesβ medea - the little theatre / anne carson / the three fates - luca cambiaso / the oresteia - aeschylus / road to hell II - hadestown / when i met you - mira lightner / andersenβs fairy tale anthology
Someone made Felonies Georg into a graphic. Bless.
![A screenshot of text, which reads: "Trump has become an unfortunate statistical outlier in the nation's 247-year history, comparable only to 'Spiders Georg,' a fictional person dreamed up by a Tumblr user who 'lives in cave & eats over 10,000 [spiders] each day' and is solely responsible for upping the average number of spiders eaten by each person per year."](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f1a6b8186061832a5987851ed485c685/d93dd066f518b5ca-ec/s1280x1920/4d35741f79147b0984d2e50e7c06f45a5a404f99.png)
I love the way the article implies that the tumblr user lives in a cave and eats over 10,000 spiders a day
I love it when my culture is mocked properly.
Bad foreigner USA jokes: school shootings.
Good foreigner USA jokes: “I work 15 hours in hamburger mine” and whatever this is.
people discovering steven universe in 2023 are always like "this show is really good why the hell were yall so weird about it"
#LITERALLY ME#I could probably find the conversation with my friend where I was like#‘yeah I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop bc I heard all the Bad Show Propaganda and then uh. That shoe never dropped. Good show.’
As someone that was there and started blocking the SU Crit tag because of so many bad faith accusations, yeah I think I can say a bit of what happened. Might be a bit disjointed but these are the things that I remember happening.
First thing was the release schedule. The Steven Bombs. Releasing like five episodes in one week and then nothing for months. This was something that CartoonNetwork had control over and might have been something that they tried to use to get Steven Universe to stop being so popular because it was gestures pretty queer.
If Steven Universe was a show that every episode was a stand alone, this wouldn't have been an issue, but it was a linear story. So major developments could drop; major character reveals/fuck-ups could happen and then the fandom would just sit on those for months. Instead of getting the next part of the story that resolved whatever just happened the fandom could sit there and stew in theories and emotions. So characters messing up would be blown out of proration and the resolution wouldn't feel like it actually enough effort on the one that messed up end.
One example was Cry for Help. When Pearl tricked Garnet into fusing more often. If I remember right, we didn't get to Pearl and Garnet actually talking out what happened there until months after the fact. In story not much time had past but for the audience that was plenty of time for people to be offended on Garnet's behalf and distort what happened.
Anther issue was "Gem Harvest" dropped right around the 2016 election. You know when Trump became president. This was made long before the election, but there were people who took that timing as somehow Rebecca Sugar and the Crew saying stuff that they weren't. I would also say this was when the discourse really took off. If that episode had aired when the crew thought it would, probably a year or months before then, I don't think people would have misread it was much as they did. It was about communication and also Uncle Andy is the one that had to realize that the way he acted had caused him to be isolated from his family. This wasn't Steven had to "make his racist uncle no longer racist all on his own" but "Steven gave him encouragement that it wasn't too late to change". But the timing was terrible and the Crew had no control on that. The Steven Bombs made several seasons last for years when they should have been over in some months.
Second, studio interference that fandom blamed on Rebecca Sugar and the Crew. The scheduling, the ending of the show feeling rushed; those were things that parts of the fandom blamed on the crew not the network. There were people that I recall saying that the crew just needed to change how Steven Universe was written to fit with the bomb format better, when the bomb format wasn't something that the crew ever wanted. That wasn't the show style that they were telling. The show got axed because Rebecca Sugar and the Crew wouldn't drop the wedding. They wanted it there because it was important to have in a kid's show. But because they stuck to their guns the rest of the story had to be speed up, and people thought that the crew should have written the ending better; when that ending was planned to have at least another season, not a week long set of episodes. Steven Universe was set up to be a long term story. One that gave time to each character to unpack their mindset and issues. But they couldn't do that with the Diamonds.
Third, people not understanding the theme of the show. Steven Universe was about family, emotions, and open communication solving issues. Characters resolved their issues by talking about them. By being open about what the issues were. That was the reason Gem War happened; because open communication because Pink Diamond and the other Diamonds just couldn't happen. We see that Steven is at his worst when he bottles up his emotions or refuses to talk about an issue that he knows he has. But despite this theme by the time we got to Change Your Mind, people were cheering for the idea of Steven shattering the Diamonds. Which ignores the theme of the show; communication. There were people that wanted Steven to kill the Diamonds when this wasn't that type of show. Steven always hated when he couldn't talk to another character and had to bubble them. Why would this kid resort to killing? That goes against the themes of this show.
Fourth, the rushed ending. The events of Change Your Mind, was something that the crew wanted to be its own season. I imagine that if the crew had gotten what they wanted we would have spent more time on Homeworld with Steven getting to know the Diamonds and sorting out their issues. Blue Diamond would have been first since we had set up with her character first. We saw her living with the regrets of losing Pink Diamond and now not doing her duties as a Diamond. But because of how rushed the ending had to be at that point the audience didn't get that time that they had wanted. Think about how long Lars's arc was. That was several seasons long. If they had gotten a season with the Diamonds like they wanted people probably wouldn't have thought that the ending was rushed.
Fifth, bad faith criticism and very toxic fandom. As I said I blocked the SU Crit tag because after a certain point people would take anything and start shoving completely off the rails criticisms at the show and expect everyone to take them in good faith. Like people claiming that Sugar, a Jewish creator, was a Nazi Apologist because Steven didn't kill the Diamonds. People projected things onto elements of the story that weren't there. People would take a screen shot and call it lazy animation because a character was off model for a fraction of a second that wouldn't be noticed without slowing it down. There was a lot of bad faith criticism. Some of it was probably from people that didn't like how queer Steven Universe was and hid it as saying it wasn't progressive enough. There were probably people that thought that a kid's show was actually not progressive enough without looking at everything behind the scenes that the creators were dealing with. There were fans that drove one of the story-boarders/writers off the show because on her own Twitter account she posted shipping art of two of the characters (Lapis Lazuli and Peridot). It was just one member of the crew showing that she liked the dynamic between two characters that was not cannon and people started harassing them. There was a lot of entitlement from the fandom.
All of those things combined just made for a terrible time.
TL;DR: The show schedule being all over the place, studio interference, people not understanding the theme of the show, the rushed ending, and a toxic fandom with bad faith criticisms all led to the show having the worst reputation. I would say that the show schedule and studio interference played the biggest part of it since other parts stemmed issues that those created.
Agreed with all of this, but as a sort of continuation of point three:
The danger of adults watching a children's show because "It's so good it could be an adult's show!" is exactly this. Shows that are literally and explicitly for kids have much simpler messaging. One of my least favourite sentences in the world is when you remind someone who is whining about a piece of children's media for not doing what they wanted out of the story that it's aimed at kids and they say "But being for kids doesn't mean it can't still be good!"
Bitch it IS good. 'Good' doesn't mean 'Does the stuff adults want so it feels satisfying and fulfilling to adults'. It means 'Does the stuff the target audience wants and successfully conveys to that audience its message.' Adults are not the target audience. Get a grip and remember you're a guest. Your enjoyment is not the point. You cannot say "The Animaniacs sucked because there was no character development and they would suddenly sing educational songs - I wanted more world building about what these alien things were and how they got into the water tower and what that means for the fabric of American society" IT WAS A KID'S SHOW THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY AND EDUCATIONAL. AND IT WAS. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
In the case of Steven Universe, Rebecca Sugar once said the aim was to 'redefine masculinity' for children - the point of the show is that Steven is surrounded by powerful women without ever feeling emasculated, and is properly and healthily connected to his emotions. He's not afraid to cry. He's open with his fears. He goes through increasing trauma, and the moral of that is 'Dont bottle up, talk to your loved ones.'
And, crucially, his first and primary response to antagonism is "Let's talk about this" and not "Let's punch this."
It was adults who turned that into a "Talk to Nazis uwu" parable, and then got mad about it; children, the target audience, did not. Children are people who are very much still learning how to process their emotions and handle conflict on the playground. Young boys are learning that they aren't allowed to cry or have feelings other than anger. Young girls are learning that they aren't allowed power and strength. All children are being told that a family can only look one way, that love can only follow one path. SU provided clear role models to the contrary and was extremely valuable for that.
And then adults projected real world political allegories onto it because that's how adult fiction works, and decided that meant it was bad and that Rebecca Sugar, a queer Jewish enby, was actually a Nazi apologist. Just a trash fire of a fandom
Mattel’s Halloween Hip Barbie 2006 came with a lovely frum denim skirt, so she looked like most of my friends. Accordingly, I figured she ought to be wearing tefillin, just like my friends. As well as the tallit (with tekhelet, of course) and tefillin, she has a siddur and a volume of Talmud.
Tefillin Barbie generated an extraordinary amount of feedback. She featured on Jewschool and Jewlicious, on BoingBoing, in the Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles, on Ritualwell, Lilith magazine(Winter ’06-’07 issue), New Voices, the London Jewish Chronicle, The Jewish Advocate, the Philadelphia Jewish Voice, the New Jersey Jewish News, the Forward, the Jewish Week…
Responses ranged from “…seriously disturbing – like watching a car accident…disgusting” to “Finally Barbie has done something I can be proud of!” and “A witty comment on contemporary American Jewish life.”
Subsequently, I must have sold a hundred or so Tefillin Barbies. The supply of that particular Barbie model dwindled. I put tefillin on other Barbie models.
jen taylor friedman (hasoferet)
